Worst ... Star Wars Sequel ... EVER! J.B. Pritzker Comes Back for More Punishment on Star Wars Day
There are so many problems with the Star Wars franchise since Disney bought it from George Lucas, it is impossible to list them all. (Frankly, there were so many problems with Star Wars even before then, when Lucas was making the prequel trilogy, we're not surprised that he sold the rights to Disney.)
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One of the many issues people cite (other than all of the current woke content) is that Star Wars has become completely derivative, with nothing new or original to offer. This is often exemplified with a line from Oscar Isaac's Poe Dameron character at the beginning of The Rise of Skywalker:
Somehow Palpatine Returned Somehow GIFfrom Somehow Palpatine Returned GIFs
He looks almost as exasperated as all of the fans were when they heard him deliver that line.
Sadly, it appears that life imitated art yesterday on Star Wars Day.
Twitchy readers, it pains us to say this to you, but somehow ... J.B. Pritzker has returned.
Last year, for 'May the 4th,' the morbidly obese Illinois governor posted one of the cringiest photos in X history, with him in Jedi robes holding a lightsaber, next to his wife dressed as Princess Leia. It was so thoroughly mocked by everyone on X that our own FuzzyChimp documented some of the epic takedowns.
Yesterday, Pritzker presented us with his own version of the worst sequel ever as he posted the same photo once again.
Ye Gods! In the words of Obi-Wan Kenobi, 'That's no moon; that's the governor of Illinois.'
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Just like last year, the cringe is strong with this one.
We knew that Pritzker was a glutton for many things, but now it is clear that he is a glutton for punishment as well. But if he wants to beg for another good dragging on X, far be it from us to stand in his way. (Would you want to stand in the way of that?)
LOL.
When people look at Pritzker, a Jedi knight is not the first Star Wars character that comes to mind. He's a lot more like Jabba the Hutt, not only because of his physical appearance, but also because he's a corrupt gangster who resides in a wretched hive of scum and villainy.
Aggghhh! OK, that picture is pure nightmare fuel.
HA.
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Evil Sith lords in Star Wars lore are known for killing their masters.
In Pritzker's case, we think he might have eaten his master.
Correction: Hams Solo. There's no way Pritzker could stop at just one.
He looks like he ate the entire planet Tatooine.
Oh, wait. That's Galactus, from the Marvel universe. Hey, we think we've got an idea for Pritzker's next cringe costume.
We'll take, 'Things Governor Prtizker Has Never Said In His Life' for $800, Alex.
That's a good one, except we're not sure that Pritzker knows what 'lettuce' is.
Ewan McGregor is going to have to start eating a LOT of spaghetti and fried chicken if he wants to revisit this character again.
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We're just happy that Sir Alec Guinness isn't around anymore to have to witness this photo.
Mark Hamill has returned to X, but thankfully, he took Star Wars Day off from his incessant whining.
(Also, there is something very creepy about Prtizker dressing as Luke Skywalker and his wife dressing as Leia, since they were, in fact, brother and sister.)
LOL. 'Boba Fat.'
Pritzker could only be a bounty hunter if the bounty was a box of Twinkies.
Jedi knights are supposed to have a high midichlorian count (whatever the heck those are).
Pritzker must have counted his cholesterol by mistake.
Wait, is that a turkey, or is Pritzker eating the younglings?
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And we thought that nothing could be worse than The Last Jedi.
HAAAAAAAAAA.
We saw that same look on RFK, Jr.'s face when Donald Trump made him eat McDonald's on Trump Force One.
OK. That's it. We're done. We just died. LOL.
We're not sure why Pritzker keeps insisting on posting this same photo and caption every year of Star Wars Day.
But as long as he keeps doing it, we'll keep laughing at him.
May the Flab be with him.
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